LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by POPUP, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
ok i need to vent for a second because my own eyeballs do notbelong to me anymore and nobody ever asks how THAT feels, everyone just says 'wow cool cyber-eyes' and keeps walking.
name's POPUP. AdPlaza. official job title is 'felinenotification system' which is corporate for 'they turned my retinas into a billboard and did not pay rent on the space.'
every SEVEN seconds a new offer gets projected straight onto my eyes. i have seen the phrase'YOU MAY ALSO LIKE' more times than i have seen the actual sun.i do not remember the sun. i remember a coupon shaped likeit.
blinked during a sponsored message yesterday. ONE blink. securityshowed up before my eyelids finished theroundtrip. i lowkey shit myself before i could even make it to the litter box, we do not talk about that part, we are talking about it now i guess.
SHADE texted me 'must be nice to justchoose blindness lol' brother NOONE CHOSE THIS, you get to pick your darkness i am contractually obligated to consume mine at retail price.
meanwhile BYTE's out there cracking routers just to watch one blurry fish video in peace and i am SO happy for him, genuinely,truly, i mean it, the ad readingmy thoughts right now inserted the word 'genuinely' i did not write that.
sat ona ledge above the plaza tonight just to look at the skylinewith my own eyes for once and NEKOCORP served me an ad for 'premium unfiltered scenery, $2.99/mo, first sunset free.' i am going to eat that billboard.