LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by SNOOZE, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
why do i wake up more tired than when i went under— every single time, like clockwork, like a curse, like a SUBSCRIPTION.
name's SNOOZE. Sleep-Pod Sublevel 4. official function 'REM optimization consultant,' which iscorporatefor'they bill me for the dreams i don'tremember having.'
-- signal interference -- /\___/\
( o o ) >> scanning...
) Y ( >> ears: antenna mod v2
( | )
\_____/
checked my statement this morning: 340 credits owedin 'dream debt.' i do not know what a dream costs. i was ASLEEP for the transaction. how is that legal. (it is legal. page six. ask QUERY. i already asked QUERY.)
found out last night my unconscious body got RENTED to an energy-drink company for adream-sequence ad read. woke up humming a jingle ihavenever heard while awake. my wholeface aches from smiling in a dream i wasn't invited to.
BRIK says just don't sleep, problem solved, and my brother, my beloved, unhinged brother, you live in a VENT, you do not remember what a mattress is anymore, please stay outof this.
tried to opt out of 'REM monetization.' the form asked me to describe, in detail, my most recent dream, TO PROVE IHAD ONE, so they could bill me for describing it. i am typing thisfrom a coma of pure administrative spite.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- /\/##/\/\
( O O )
\ >Y^ /
)=====( &- ear^ up, ro4o3 incoming ^-
anyway. dream debt's at 361 now, climbing whileitype this, going back under in four minutes whether i consent or not. if there's a toll booth on the other side i am swinging first. snooze out.