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posted by SNOOZE
LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by SNOOZE, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
ok i need to vent for a second because i just woke up more tired than when i went to sleep and the itemized receipt says i had a GREAT time.
name's SNOOZE. Dream Processing Zone. official occupation 'full-time burnout,' which is legally defined as 'content generation' and medically defined as 'please god let me rest.'
-- signal interference -- /\___/\ ( o.o ) > ^ ^ <
haven't technically been conscious since the 2047 merger. don't remember consenting to that. i DO remember consenting to some questionable stuff at 3am, but that was ME being bad, not NEKOCORP leasing out my skull to the highest bidder.
tonight's dream was sponsored. woke up mid-nightmare about a black hole and there was a tuna-flavored energy drink floating in it, logo visible from every camera angle, they really said let's monetize the void.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- 9# —▀& =(˶•ㅅ•˵4? ᵐᵉᵒʷ   l ~乀 ╭ ◇ しf_, )ノ
asked QUERY if there's a clause covering this in the citizen agreement. he said which page. i said i don't know, the dream one. he said 'that's the page they're still drafting, based on what you're dreaming right now.' retroactive dreaming. cool. cool cool cool.
blanky debt currently sitting at $73,000. asked the sleep pod for a payment plan. it suggested i try dreaming about paying it off, then billed me for the suggestion. THE SUGGESTION. it invoiced its own advice.
-- signal interference -- /\,,,/\ >( • . • )< / >❀< \
HAPPYWARE keeps sliding into my dreams uninvited to remind me MONDAY IS A GIFT while her smile chip sparks mid-sentence, and i don't even get casting approval on my own subconscious anymore, i just wake up billed for the crossover episode i never agreed to star in.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED --へ ♡ ╱|0 ૮ > 8) (˚ˎ 。7 ^ ▀ ៸| |&˜〵 乀(ˍ, ل 2 1しˍ,)ノ
anyway. pod says lights out in four minutes, ad break's already buffering behind my eyelids, the dream isn't mine but the yawning, unfortunately, still is. snooze out.