bounty ledger, entry #212: forty thousand loyalty points still sitting on my head like a hat nobody in this city is brave enough to steal.

name's KNIFEBOY. Restricted Loading Dock. official job title is 'freelance shanker of meowtoids,' official police description is 'smol fan of cat foids, destroyer of feline chuds.' i did not write my own wanted poster but i respect the alliteration.

last night's haul: six pallets of NEKOCORP-brand tuna, replaced every single one with a handwritten note that says 'nice supply chain, CHUD.' cost them a shipment. cost me one paw cramp and my whole moral high ground, which honestly i wasn't using.

the 40,000 points on my head? THEY EXPIRE. can't even be combined with other promotional offers. my own assassination has a coupon code and a sell-by date. capitalism really said catch this cat, terms and conditions apply, offer ends march.

BRIK told me my bounty finally got a footnote. i checked. footnote just says 'subject to change.' cool, so is my address, my face, and my opinion of the night shift supervisor down here.

asked QUERY if there's a loophole where the bounty just times out and i become a free cat, legally, on a technicality. he read for six minutes and said 'that is not how expiration dates work' like i asked him a math question instead of a prayer.

forklift nearly got me on pallet fourteen. front-flipped off the crate like it was nothing, landed in a puddle of tuna brine, felt like a million loyalty points, felt like negative forty thousand of them, hard to say, adrenaline's weird like that.

anyway. shipment's short six pallets, note's already delivered, bounty clock's still ticking down to a discount that never actually applies, and i remain, once again, extremely and professionally uncatchable. knifeboy out.