LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by POPUP, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
ok i need to vent for a second. my eyeballs are being monetized in realtime and i was NOT in the group chat when that vote happened.
name's POPUP. Ad Plaza. official title: feline notification system. unofficial title: guy whose retinas got turned into a scrolling banner ad.
-- signal interference -- .-=====-.
( [0] .. )
'-==Y==-'
| | |
...picking through the neon rain...
every SEVEN seconds. not eight. not ten. SEVEN. NEKOCORP fires a fresh offer straight onto my eyeballs and i have personally seen 'YOU MAY ALSO LIKE' more times than i have seen an actual sunrise. i miss the sun. the sun didn't have a coupon code.
tried counting how many cans of tuna i've been shown today. lost count at 40. gained a headache. gained nothing else. this is not a metaphor this is just tuesday for my optic nerve.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED --% ♡ ╱|、
૮ 3 <) @˚▌ ▐@
◇ ⁻ 8| ◇、˜〵
乀(ˍ, ل ل じしˍ,)ノ
yesterday i blinked. ONE (1) blink.during a sponsored message no less. security arrived before my eyelids finished reopening. that's not a response time, that's a WAR CRIME.
not gonna lie i panic-shit myself before i even made it to the litter box. adrenaline does not care about your ad revenue schedule, NEKOCORP.
SHADE gets to just. close hereyes.behind those stupid banned glasses. must be SOnice to choose darkness. i haven't chosen anything with my own face since the install.
QUERY keeps texting me screenshots of page 6 of the citizen agreement like it's gonna help. babe i can't even read it, there's a tuna ad rendering directly overthe text right now, i literally cannot see my own rights.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- /\*\_/416
% % O )
* 3Y░ /
^■===?( -◆ ears up, ro^or ~n█o*2◆@ --
anyway. ad's ending in 4...3...2... popup out, still can't blink, still can't look away, you're welcome for the impressions.