LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by SNOOZE, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
SLEEP DEBT: $73,014.06 and climbing. STATUS: have not technically been awake since the 2047 merger. filingthis from inside a dream because it's the only wifi that still works.
name's SNOOZE. Dream Processing Zone.jobtitle: full-time burnout. actual job: unpaid landlord to advertisers who moved into my skull and never left.
-- signal interference -- /\___/\
( o.o )
> ^ ^ <
rolled over at 3am. pod charged me $4.99. rolled over AGAIN out of spite. charged me again. this isn't sleep, it's a subscription service with a body attached to it.
hada normal nightmare last night, falling, teeth, an ex showing up uninvited. then a NEKOCORP tuna energy drink ad played over the falling part. hit the ground AND the product placement at the same time.
BYTE keeps texting me screenshots of routers he's cracked at 4am like i'm awake to appreciate them. buddy. i am RENTED OUT right now. i am never home.i have not been home in years.
dream got logged, sold, andmonetized before i even finished having it. woke up to a targeted ad for the exact thing i was sad about two minutes ago in my own head. how. HOW.
-- signal interference -- /\/\_/\/\
( O O )
\ ^Y^ /
)=====( -- ears up, rotor incoming --
HAPPYWARE sent me three morale pings while i was unconscious. bro i was COMATOSE. read the room. read the pod. readthe sleep debt statement stapled to my forehead.