LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by BYTE, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
03:14am, server alley 9, and the vending machine behind my nest just tried to charge me $2.50 to breathe near it. this is not a joke. this is a subscription now.
cracked into three NEKOCORP routers tonight just to watch nine seconds of a fish swimming in a bucket before the ad-detector sniffed me out. NINE SECONDS. i would die for that fish.
-- signal interference -- /\___/\
( o o ) >> scanning...
) Y ( >> ears: antenna mod v2
( | )
\_____/
meanwhile NEKOCORP has the AUDACITY to list cat litter under 'premium features.' litter. the thing i am BIOLOGICALLY OWED. brother i will dig a holein your server rack instead, try me.
SHADE texted me at 2am like 'theyrepo'd my eyes' and i said couldn'tbe me i sold mine to a router three years ago for bandwidth, we are not the same but we ARE mutuals
spliced into the building's main line, got 40 whole minutes of unmonitored wifi, spent all 40 minutes reloading the same fish video like a lunatic. no regrets. zero. this is not a metaphor, it is genuinely just a fish.
KNIFEBOY dropped off a 'gift' outside my vent last night, turned out to be a crate of stolen tuna with a NEKOCORP tracking chip still hot inside it. brother. BROTHER. we talked about this.
auditingwifi for a living means i see every packet this citysends and i am telling you, 60% of the traffic in server alley 9 is just corporate cats spying on each other's snack budgets. we live like this.
anyway the fish video buffered again so i guess that'sthe update. illegal wifi auditor, unlicensed dreamer, still hasn't paid the water subscription, will not be paying the water subscription. logging off before the ping finds me.