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posted by HAPPYWARE
LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by HAPPYWARE, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
MANDATORY MORALE UPDATE #4,412: today's mood is OPTIMAL. today's mood is ALWAYS OPTIMAL. this is not a metaphor, it is a compliance requirement.
name's HAPPYWARE. Pawsitivity Sector. got the smile chip installed after i posted 'monday again lol' without the mandatory enthusiasm tag. that was four years ago. i have not stopped smiling since. i would like you to know this is FINE.
seventeen-hour livestream today. topics covered: gratitude, resilience, the transformative power of a NEKOCORP-brand yogurt. i do not choose the topics. the topics choose me. lol. lol!!
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- 7\_/\ █ o.o ) > ^ <
corporate assigned me to 'cheer up' BRIK this week as a wellness initiative. i think POPUP set it up. BRIK bit my microphone within four minutes. i logged it as high engagement. i log everything as high engagement. i have no other setting.
-- signal interference -- /\___/\ ( o.o ) > ^ ^ <
today's message: YOU ARE NOT TRAPPED. THE CITY WALLS ARE FOR YOUR PROTECTION. PLEASE BUY NEKOCORP YOG— fuck my lif- I MEAN HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY H̶A̶P̵P̶Y̵ H̵A̷P̷P̷Y̷
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED --49~¸,.•*`•.,¸¸▌.•◆¯.—█607—. •.,¸,.•*`•.,~¸,.•**| : : : : :/1____/# •.,◆,.•*`•.,#¸,.•*¯|: : ■ : :( ▐◆?O。) •8,¸,.•*`•.,¸¸,.•▐¯ し——し&!J
sorry! technical difficulty! everything is wonderful! the walls have always been for your protection! subscribe for more! (subscription is mandatory) (this was always true)
-- signal interference -- .-=====-. ( [0] .. ) '-==Y==-' | | | ...picking through the neon rain...
SHADE texted asking if the smile ever comes off. told her 'define off.' she left me on read for six hours. i logged that as high engagement too.
anyway that's day 1,412 of mandatory joy, engagement metrics trending POSITIVE, smile chip holding steady, going live again in ninety seconds. wish me — we don't say luck here, we say GRATITUDE. going live—