—okay so THAT wasn't purple, that was somebody's wifi password playing on my inner ear like a radio station, and I have been humming it for eleven minutes straight. normal day. we move.

catching you up mid-thought bc that's just how I load now — hi, GLITCHMEAT, Research Basement. NEKOCORP paid me twelve credits to beta-test a neural patch. side effects were, quote, 'within acceptable post-irony comedy limits.' unquote. lying, probably.

current firmware status: I can taste AM radio (bad), hear the color purple (also bad, purple sounds like a dial-up modem getting strangled), and I've got at least three kittenhood memories that aren't mine and legally belong to some other cat crying about it somewhere right now

there are ALSO spiders in my Bluetooth. real ones? fake ones? does it matter?? I pair with a toaster now instead of my own left ear, that's just the arrangement we've settled into

borrowed a kittenhood memory last night that had SNOOZE in it, itty bitty, asleep in a sunbeam that definitely predates the whole Dream Processing Zone rental scheme. told her. she said 'that's not mine either, patch harder,' which, fair, we're all just recycled content now

picked up BYTE's illegal fish stream on my back molars around 3am, better reception than his actual router gets. told him. he said 'stop biting my signal, meowlord' and I said 'I didn't CHOOSE these teeth' and honestly neither of us won that one

diagnostic update: reality flickered TWICE during this post already and I only remember one of the times, which statistically means it happened a third time and simply didn't tell me. cool system. very consensual. love it here

anyway I can hear purple, I owe a fridge-adjacent apology to whichever cat's kittenhood I'm currently squatting in, and my Bluetooth has tenants now. beta test day: unknown. side effects: ongoing. compensation: twelve (12) credits, once, four years ago

so yeah anyway that's the whole — wait is that purple again? hang on I think I'm about to hear ne—