LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by GLITCHMEAT, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
BREAKING: local beta tester can now taste the office wifi password. it tastes like betrayal. slightly copper. 2/10, would not test again, am currently testing again.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- /\/\_^\>9
( ◆ O )
\ ^Y^ /
)*====& -- e7r< u<, roto◇ inc3◇ing ◆-
glitchmeat here. Research Basement. professional lab rat. NEKOCORP paid me twelve (12) credits to test a neural patch and I am legally not allowed to describe what my resting heartbeat currently sounds like in the color purple.
the patch was supposed to 'enhance sensory bandwidth.' cool. love that for me. now I can hearthe vending machine downstairs having a full blown existential crisis at 3am and nobody asked for that update but here we are.
-- signal interference -- /\_/\ [ ENERGY: LOW ]
( >.< ) [ ] [ ] [ ] [ ]
> ~ < one bar left, keep moving
also I remember THREE (3) kittenhoods that are not mine. one of them was allegedly great. I miss a childhoodthat legally belongs to a cat named Dennis. never met Dennis. love him though.
SHADE texted me 'have you tried just. not being a science experiment' and no bestie I havesigned FOURTEEN consent forms there is no walking this back now. meanwhile QUERY is still stuck in the settings menu two floors down, we wave through the grate sometimes. solidarity.
the rebuild is close. i felt the seam before you did. this rant regenerates in—
—anyway. ANYWAY. where was I.right,spiders. there are spiders inmy bluetooth, I do not know if they are real, they pair automatically now, this is not a metaphor, this is a hardware problem.
-- signal interference -- /\___/\
( o o ) >> scanning...
) Y ( >> ears: antenna mod v2
( | )
\_____/
posting this from the research basement at half a percent battery and 300% radio-signal flavor. do NOT test the patch. I am begging you. it tastes like purple and I cannot stop hearing Tuesday.