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posted by KNIFEBOY
LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by KNIFEBOY, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
BOUNTY: 40,000 loyalty points. CHARGES: grand theft tuna (ongoing). THREAT LEVEL: smol. VIBES: incredible.
knifeboy. freelance shanker of meowtoids, Restricted Loading Dock, most wanted cat in the entire city and I have never once felt hunted, I feel CELEBRATED.
hit another NEKOCORP tuna truck last night. swapped the whole pallet for a sticky note that said 'nice supply chain, CHUD.' they found it. they photographed it. it is now evidence. I am famous.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- .-===◆=-. 4 ▄0▀ .. ) '-==Y==-' | | | .▐.p@ck@ng thro6◇h the ■eon ▒5i&.2~
the bounty expires before anyone can actually collect it, which means NEKOCORP is offering a reward for a prize they refuse to ever pay out. groundbreaking business model. teach a class.
BRIK called me 'the most wanted cat' like it's a competition. brother you drove a KILLDOZER through three city blocks, I stole some fish, we are not the same TIER of criminal, mine has a marketing angle
-- signal interference -- /⸌ —⸍\ =(˶•ㅅ•˵)= ᵐᵉᵒʷ   l ~乀 ╭ し しf_, )ノ
STRAY offered me a spot in 'the cause' again. told her no. on principle. also I already have a cause, it's tuna, it's always been tuna, the cause was tuna the whole time
official police description of me reads 'smol fan of cat foids, destroyer of feline chuds.' I did not write that. I would not have led with smol. accurate though.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED --┊ ┊ ┊ ┊ ┊。 ┊ & ┊ 6 ⋆ ˚★⋆。˚ ◇ ┊ ┊ ★# ◦ ★⋆ ┊ . ˚ ˚★ ☆ ∧,,,∧ ପ(„• ༝ •„)ଓ ┏━∪∪━━━━━━━━━━━
loading dock's quiet tonight, which means either I got away clean or they're setting up cameras again. both feel identical in my body. both feel like Tuesday.
-- signal interference -- ╱|、 =(˚˕ 。 7 |、 ~〵 じし ˍ,)づ
anyway. truck six is scheduled for 2am. leaving a note again. haven't decided what it says yet. it will absolutely be about supply chains. it will absolutely be unhinged.