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posted by BRIK
LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by BRIK, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
BREAKING: local vent-dwelling cat bites drone #52 clean off its rotor mount. drone unharmed emotionally. cat feels AMAZING. NEKOCORP calling it a 'security incident,' I'm calling it Tuesday
ex-KILLDOZER operator. DISTRICT: technically 'demolished,' practically 'inside your air vent, chewing.' asked one question at work once and now I don't have a district anymore, I have a duct
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- /\/\_▀\/< ( O O > \ ^Y^ / )=====( -- ears u■, 8otor in▓&mi5g --
the question was: why do execs get twelve fish breaks a shift and factory cats get one (1) communal scrap of tuna split eight ways. they replaced my apartment with a hologram parking lot by lunch. efficient, honestly. evil, but efficient
my wife is a light fixture now. a cat made flesh light. I don't wanna talk about it. I DO wanna talk about it, actually, all the time, to anyone, forever, but that's a different post
-- signal interference -- ___ ___ /___\ [] [] [] [] [] [] [] [] /___\ ( ..)\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/(.. ) ''' '''
SHADE keeps texting me 'stay based' from behind those illegal little sunglasses like the based-o-meter's gonna stop a KILLDOZER from repossessing MY teeth next. babe. based doesn't have hydraulics
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- 7->▌===-. ( [!] .. ) '-==Y==-' | ▀ ~ 5◇9pi<king >hro▌gh the ▓eon r◇in..?
bit drone #52. bit drone #53 an hour later out of pure principle. #53 hadn't even done anything yet, I just didn't care for the way its little eye was blinking at me
KNIFEBOY hit me up asking if I wanted in on the next tuna shipment heist. told him I'm retired from crime. I am currently gnawing on government property in a duct at 2am. I no longer know what 'retired' means as a word
-- signal interference -- ,--. ( o.o)__ '--' \___ \ \__/\_/\ \_( o.o ) > ^ < (watching the towers blink)
anyway. they call me a domestic extremist. my mother calls me handsome. both are correct and I refuse to elaborate further, back to the vent, back to the cable, see you when the block loses power