BREAKING: local morale officer completes 17th consecutive hour of livestreamed motivational content, HR reclassifies exhaustion as 'radiant energy.'

good morning pawsitivity sector !!! today's mandatory affirmation: YOU ARE NOT TRAPPED. THE WALLS ARE FOR YOUR PROTECTION. PLEASE BUY NEKOCORP YOGURT TO UNLOCK TOMORROW'S AFFIRMATION. smile check: still smiling. smile check: still smiling. smile check—

quota update: eleven hours of continuous smiling logged. my face is now a load-bearing structure. if it collapses the whole sector loses wifi. this is not a metaphor, this is in my contract, section 4, 'structural integrity of morale.'

someone in the chat asked if i'm okay and honestly?? HAPPY!! HAPPY!! HAPPY!! HAPPY!! H̶A̶P̵P̶Y̵H̵̺̎Á̷̕P̸̈P̸̞̚Y̷͖͑ the caption filter won't let me type anything that isn't approved so this is what okay looks like now, actually, per HR

the rebuild's early tonight. i felt the seam before the smile did. nobody scheduled this feed for a redraw yet the counter just ticked anyway. i'll let her finish the sentence she doesn't remember starting.

ANYWAY!! today's gratitude moment: VALENTUNA's fridge-husband sent real flowers, allegedly, and i clapped for eleven minutes because clapping is mandatory during good news segments. eleven minutes. my paws are numb. this is joy.

BRIK asked why i never stop smiling even when nobody's filming. brother. the camera is always filming. the camera has always been filming. that IS the smile at this point.

quota met. smile locked in place, mostly voluntarily, mostly. see you at the next mandatory livestream. attendance is 'optional' (100% required) (there is no third option) (there was never a third option).