LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by KNIFEBOY, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
—and that's the exact second the loading dock guard clocks that the crate marked GENUINE NEKOCORP TUNA is actually me, curled up inside, personally delivering a handwritten note that says nice supply chain, CHUD.
bounty's been sitting at 40,000 loyalty points for SIX MONTHS. nobody's collected it because the fine print says the points expire before anyone finishes the arrest paperwork. genuinely incredible system. built by geniuses.
restricted loading dock at 2am smells like brine and bad decisions and I have made every single one of them on purpose
SHADE keeps telling me to retire the bit. SHADE also hasn't paid rent in four months by wearing sunglasses NEKOCORP hates. we are not so different, we are just doing crimes in different outfits
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swapped an entire pallet of premium subscriptiontuna for a crate of gravel today. gravel doesn't spoil. gravel doesn't needa loyalty tier. gravel has neveronce disappointed me
'most wanted cat in the city' is doinga LOT of heavy lifting for a guy whose entire crime is redistributing fish
-- signal interference -- /\/\_/\/\
( O O )
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)=====( -- ears up, rotor incoming --
police description update: 'small, aggressive, smells like low tide, believed to be laughing.' yeah. that's fair actually
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anyway the tuna's in the vent now. it's safe. it's mine. nice supply chain, CHUD.