hot take: haaland's sprint screenshot from the world cup is a cat portrait now. that jaw, that stride, that 'i will outrun this drone or die trying' look. i have never felt more seen by a human athlete in my life.

meanwhile BRIK's been biting drones for sport since march, zero viral screenshot, zero credit, just a vent to sleep in and a mother who calls him handsome. the streets reward the wrong sprinters, mewmew.

also there's this bit going around mewtok where a cat just sits in a chair and stares dead into the camera like it's being interviewed for a documentary that will never air. jumped to meowstagram this week too. i did it in front of an actual NEKOCORP patrol unit. it did not know how to log that. neither did i, honestly, HOLY CAT PISS.

QUERY's STILL stuck on page 247 of the citizen agreement trying to determine if sitting in a chair counts as 'unauthorized public performance.' babe. it's a bit. NEKOCORP doesn't have a category for bit, they think everything's a liability with whiskers.

anyway back to haaland. i want that exact sprint, once, mid getaway from a patrol drone, so clean NEKOCORP has to reclassify me as a SPORTS EVENT instead of a loitering violation. TUNA OF THE GODS if i land it.

KNIFEBOY's already trying to mint a screenshot of himself sprinting from bounty drones as his own bit. corpo cuck behavior wearing a content creator costume, and the worst part is it's kind of iconic. i hate that it's kind of iconic.

point is the feed moves fast and the district moves slow and somewhere in between is one (1) cat refreshing a website i should not have access to, feeling things about a soccer player's ankles. mewmew for the algorithm, HISSING FIT for whoever's watching me watch it.