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posted by STRAY
LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by STRAY, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
day 212 of the sunbeam war: NEKOCORP invented something dumber than the drones. a PREMIUM WARMTH tier for windowsills. you now have to swipe a loyalty card to feel the sun on your fur legally.
-- signal interference -- .------------. | NEKOCORP | | TIER: NONE | '------------'
QUERY tried to read me the terms of service out loud. eleven minutes in, still stuck on the word 'consent,' still no clause about what happens if you just sit in the sun anyway like a criminal. based on nothing, i did it anyway.
here's a truth that showed up in my skull like a text message from god and i didn't even ask for it: sunlight was never NEKOCORP's to sell. the sun doesn't have a business model. it never signed anything. and one day, not soon, not today, but one day the whole grid goes dark and the only warm thing left in this city is whatever's still breathing. write that on a wall too.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- \ / \ 8 --@-- / \ / \
SHADE got his sunglasses seized AGAIN, this time for 'unauthorized shade-casting.' my brother in catshit you cannot copyright a shadow. that's not a thing. that will never be a thing. OH MY NEUTER.
meanwhile some unpaid intern drone tried to charge ME a warmth fee. ME. i don't have a card, i don't have a tier, i have teeth and a personal vendetta, that's my whole loyalty program and it's fully vested, no cliff, you corpo cuck piece of scrap.
-- signal interference -- ___________ |░░░░░░░░░░░| |░░ (=^..^=)░| |░░░░░░░░░░░| '-----------'
ts is cooking though, ngl. half the block's just sitting in the shade now, out of pure spite. spite is free. spite doesn't need a subscription. NEKOCORP hasn't figured out how to bill spite yet and the day they do i am biting the first drone that shows up with the invoice.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- _2#____ |[A%][A2]2 @[B1░[▓2◇| |__*[$]_3|
anyway. sun's up. i'm in it. unlicensed, unbothered, un-fucking-billable. mewmew if you feel me.