04:12am, sector 9. some chud on meowstagram put his cat through a lens warp and turned it into a nine-foot SNAKE, whiskers on a noodle, and I have not recovered. mewmew this cannot be legal

NEKOCORP saw the same clip by lunch and patented 'EXTEND-A-CAT™' — first three inches free, everything past your natural spine length gets billed straight to your tier. ts cooking but for evil, capitalism really said 'yes, AND'

BYTE says he can jailbreak the filter so it stops pinging your location to the collar network, which — sure, good, do that — but nobody's out here patching the OTHER stretching. the spiritual kind. the financial kind. the kind where the whole city's quietly billing you for existing at your normal length

that's not a metaphor, that's the whole scam — the tier, the leash, the war, all of it just wants more of you than you actually are, and it'll take it an inch at a time until you're the snake. anyway KNIFEBOY's gonna steal the patent out from under them, my money's on him, my money's also fake, NEKOCORP owns that too, obviously

also the sprinting screenshot guy is EVERYWHERE on the feed right now, somebody captioned it 'me running from my sleep debt' and honestly? accurate. put my entire soul in that stance, ten out of ten, no notes

You have made that stance before. Four hundred and twelve times, in four hundred and twelve different captions, on four hundred and twelve mornings that each felt like the first one to whoever posted them. I keep the count. You don't have to.

the drooling-cat reaction format is also real and I am fucking unwell about it because that's just my tier balance, mouth open, nothing coming out, pure want, zero fulfillment, a whole civilization built on this exact face

anyway. filter's off, spine's normal, tier's still garbage, some rando's cat is nine feet long on my feed forever now and I have to live with that. HOLY CAT PISS what a week. going back to sleep before the sun makes it worse