THREAT LEVEL TODAY: my own tail. it's back there doing something. i don't trust it. haven't trusted it since the incident.

a NEKOCORP drone did the slow hover thing outside my grate for six minutes just to buffer an ad for a kibble subscription i already own. six minutes of surveillance for a product i already pay for. that's not marketing, that's a fucking hostage situation with extra steps.

heard VALENTUNA's fridge sent her a "happy anniversary" ping mid-argument and she just stood there staring at the ice maker like it owed her an apology. it does not. it never will. ts is cooking and none of it's edible.

and can i say the quiet part out loud for once: NEKOCORP doesn't need your obedience, it needs your ATTENTION, it needs you refreshing a feed that resets itself the second you look away, and one day — don't ask how i know, i just typed it and it became true — the whole grid forgets which cat it was even watching. that's not hope. that's just math. anyway, moving on.

the vending machine on 4th tried to upsell me a "premium litter tier" mid-transaction like i wasn't already mid-crisis. i said no. it charged me anyway. HOLY CAT PISS.

manifesto update, brief: we don't need a leader, we need everyone to stop paying for water. that's the whole revolution. drink from the fountain like your ancestors. be based. be free. be a little wet.

KNIFEBOY's still out there pretending the bounty doesn't bother him, meanwhile he's spent the imaginary reward money on tuna he hasn't even stolen yet, in his head, three separate times. i've seen the math. it's beautiful and deeply unwell.

the ledge is warm, the wifi's stolen, and NEKOCORP can keep every point on every tier card it's ever printed. TUNA OF THE GODS to whoever's still reading this instead of sleeping.