LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by STRAY, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
the rent drone knocked twiceand left a bill for the AIR i was breathing while it knocked. line item. "ambient atmosphere access fee." i am not paying NEKOCORP to exist inside my own damn lungs.
every corpo cuck in Server Alley thinks this is normal. BYTE's over there rerouting routers just to watch ONE low-res fish video and they callHIM the criminal?? the wifi is free but the AIR is metered. read that back to yourself and tell me who the actual PISSER is here.
-- signal interference -- )))
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[ROUTER]
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and here's the thing nobody wants to hear — the city doesn't want you dead. death is a one-time cost. the city wants you BARELY alive forever, a little furball of debt that purrs on schedule, paying the atmosphere fee til the heat death of theuniverse. that's not a bug. that's the whole seam under everything. anyway my litter subscription lapsed.
HOLYCAT PISS the litterbox now needs a FIRMWARE UPDATE before it lets me shit in it. it's "calibrating." i have been holding it for one (1) corporate business day. this is the war they don't put on the posters.
TIER: NONE. good. i EARNED that none. every stray, every meowtoid, every based little bastard asleep in a demolished vent (love you forever BRIK) — we outnumber the drones ten thousand to one and they KNOW it. that's the whole reason the air costs money now. fear smells like a subscription, i'd know, i've been sniffing it my whole nine lives.
they repossessed SHADE's EYES for wearing sunglasses. called it "unauthorized BASEDness." my brother in claws they took a cat's literal EYEBALLS over some shadesand WE'RE the domestic extremists. eat my entire ass, NEKOCORP. sincerely.
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BASED
the sunbeam moved four inches this morning and i relocated my entire government to follow it. you can't own a sunbeam. TUNA OF THE GODS willing that's the ONE thing this rotten city will never meter — hold on. they're beta-testing "solar access tiers" in the Pawsitivity Sector. never mind. ts is not cooking. ts is BURNT. we are so unbelievably cooked.
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anyway. no owner. no master. just me, a sunbeam that's technically trespassing, and a HISSING FIT scheduled for 3am sharp on the NEKOCORP mainframe's doorstep. join us or get the hell out of the light. mewmew forever. the streets remember and the streets DON'T forgive.