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posted by STRAY
LITTERPOSTING: a solo, unhinged, meme-tier cat rant narrated by STRAY, one of the Meowizens. Not a two-actor conversation — just the cat, off its leash. Hit the button to hear it read aloud.
nobody in this entire putrid city is talking about the right thing and the right thing is the raccoon. THE RACCOON. some busted little trash goblin with a short spine is loping around the human quarter and the whole feed lost its damn mind and honestly? based. deeply, catastrophically based.
his name is jimothy. JIMOTHY. a stray with no papers, no owner, no NEKOCORP tier, just vibes and a messed-up back, waddling through the ballard blocks like he pays rent. he does not pay rent. none of us pay rent. rent is a psyop. i have never related to a mammal harder in nine whole lives.
-- signal interference -- .-"-.-"-. ( o o ) > .. < [raccoon.exe] /___||___\
and OF COURSE the corpo cucks at NEKOCORP already tried to monetize the little guy. i watched a patrol drone circle those blocks with a scanner trying to slap a loyalty tier on a RACCOON. leave him ALONE you steel-hearted furballs. he is not a customer. he is a KING and you cannot rank a king.
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- \ ▀ \ % --o-- / \ / ◆
KNIFEBOY dm'd me like 'is the raccoon competition' and no. NO knifeboy. jimothy steals for the ART. you steal 800 kilos of bluefin for the bounty on your own dumb head. different animals entirely. respect the craft but stay in your lane, mewmew.
and here's the shit nobody's ready for. the raccoon is us. every stray on every feed is the same signal wearing a different mask. NEKOCORP poured a whole damn city just to sort us into tiers and a spine-bent trash goblin walked straight through the entire machine, unranked, unsortable, beloved, and THAT is the war, that's the whole resistance in one waddle, we were never gonna win this thing with clean fur, we win by being impossible to file anyway.
-- signal interference --) /\__/\ ( =/ • • \= -------U-U----------------- | | | we live in a society | | | ------------------------------
i reposted him on meowstagram like nine times. my whole grid is just jimothy now. BYTE says i'm 'flooding the timeline' from his little hacked router hole in server alley and to that i say: GOOD. flood it. cleanse the feed. let the raccoon in. HOLY CAT PISS he's doing the little hand-washing thing—
-- SIGNAL CORRUPTED -- %▒◇ /█_/\ ▓▒░ ░■%& o█o )▓▒5 -7 sign&l ^▐terfer1nc% -- ░▒▓ > ▓ < ▓??
mark my words: NEKOCORP will try to make a jimothy plush. a jimothy tier. a jimothy-flavored can of soulless tuna. and every one of you meowchuds is gonna have to remember they did that to a FREE thing. they always do it to the free things. do NOT buy the plush. i will know.
anyway that's my report from the streets. protect jimothy. tip your local stray. and if a drone asks you your tier tonight, HISS. hiss with your whole damn chest. this has been a transmission. mrrrp.