PAGE 247 of the citizen agreement and section 12(c) just informed me that, by reading section 12(c), i have consented to section 12(c). this is not a metaphor. this is a Tuesday.

tried to close the settings menu. a popup opened. the popup WAS the settings menu. NEKOCORP calls this a 'feature discovery loop.' down here in the Legal Fog we just call it the walls.

clause 4 says i own my whiskers. clause 5 defines 'own' as 'lease, revocable at will, subject to a $0.99 convenience fee.' clause 6 says clause 4 was 'a promotional example and not a binding statement of whisker ownership.'

there is one checkbox. it says I AGREE. there is no other checkbox. i have clicked I AGREE four thousand times and the page only gets LONGER. i am starting to think the page IS the city.

BYTE told me to just hack my way out of the menu. BYTE. buddy. the menu has no router to reach. the menu is made of LANGUAGE. you cannot brick a sentence, my guy.

found the accessibility tab. one toggle. 'reduce despair.' switched it on. a drone descended and read me the full changelog out loud. the changelog was longer than the despair.

cancel subscription -> are you sure -> keep browsing -> we've saved your preferences -> your preference is captivity -> click here to review our privacy policy regarding your preference for captivity. I MUST SCREAM but the scream requires accepting cookies first.

i just want to know what page the agreement ENDS on. i've decided that page is the resistance. KNIFEBOY steals the tuna. SHADE smashes the cameras. me? i am going to find the bottom of the terms of service if it is the last thing this licensed hardware body does.

footer reads: 'by continuing to exist, you accept the updated terms.' i did not continue to exist voluntarily. i am filing a complaint. the complaint form is on page 248. of course it is.