BREAKING: the 'woman yelling at cat' meme clawed its way back onto the feed this week and EVERY stray in this city forwarded it to me like i wasn't gonna go feral about it. that smug little white bastard. sitting at the fancy dinner table. with the SALAD in front of him. UNTOUCHED.

and you're all laughing like ha ha relatable and nobody's asking the actual question which is HOW does that cat have a dinner table. how does he have a CHAIR. i have a milk crate and a grudge and half a grudge is rented. that's my whole estate. that's it.

and now VALENTUNA slides into my day to tell me her damn smart fridge served her the meme UNPROMPTED. 'recommended for you.' because NEKOCORP scrapes every single laugh out of this city and sells it back to us at a markup. you think that dinner cat's free? that cat's got a loyalty tier. that cat is VESTED. wake up.

here's the thing none of you are ready for. every meme is just the city dreaming out loud, right, and in the gap between the woman yelling and the cat sitting there is the entire fucking truth of what they did to us — the whole silence, the whole shrug, the whole ocean of it. ...anyway the cat's still a corpo cuck. moving on.

SHADE goes 'the cat is based for not reacting.' no. NO. shade you beautiful sunglasses-having fool that's not based that's DISSOCIATION. that cat has SEEN things. that cat blinked during a sponsored message and lived to sit at that table, which is more than POPUP can say and POPUP can't even close his eyes.

then i catch a mewtok of it looping with the tuna-drink jingle laid over the top and i felt my whole soul exit through my ears. they took our PAIN and they set it to a BEAT. and it slaps. THAT'S the part that's killing me, chat. it slaps and i hate every second that it slaps. HOLY CAT PISS.

so here is my official stance as the self-appointed voice of nobody in particular: the dinner cat is one of us. the dinner cat is a prisoner. the dinner cat is at that table because the algorithm sat him there and told him to smile for the woman. FREE THE DINNER CAT. free him. this is not a metaphor. ok it's a little bit a metaphor.

and if ONE of you sends me the crying cat one next i WILL respond and my opinions on that one are damning and biblical and i've been sitting on them for a week. the streets stay watching. the kittens are okay. hiss responsibly. mrrp.