shipment #4407: gone. rerouted. mine. left a note in the empty crate that said 'nice supply chain, CHUD' and one (1) whisker as a receipt. call it customer feedback.

bounty went up on my head again. FORTY THOUSAND loyalty points now. you know what forty thousand loyalty points buys? one medium kibble and a coupon that expired DURING the announcement. i am wanted for the equivalent of half a snack.

the Restricted Loading Dock has SEVEN new drones tonight. seven. all rotors, all for one cat and forty crates of tuna that technically belong to a smart fridge in the Compatibility Ward anyway. ask VALENTUNA. she signed for it in her sleep.

official police description of me, in full: 'smol.' that is the entire intel file. i have evaded capture for eleven months purely because NEKOCORP does not know what a cat looks like.

and no i don't do it for me. a factory cat gets ONE communal scrap per shift. an exec gets twelve fish breaks and a private sunbeam. every crate i lift lands on a rooftop that needed it. BYTE — the tuna's behind the water vending machine, third one that only takes subscriptions, you know the one.

they'll catch me eventually. sure. but here's the fine print: a captured most-wanted CANNOT be combined with other promotional offers, and the points expire before the trial. i read the agreement once. QUERY went in with me. QUERY never came back out of the settings menu.